yes, for an actual film

            The sun is rising on a warm spring day.  A pink Cadillac is speeding down a lonely highway.  In the car, DAVID SWIMMER turns to his brother, JASON BRIGGS, and asks for directions.  They’ve been driving all night from Ohio State University and they want to make it to Spring Break before anyone else.  But as David checks the highway signs, his heart sinks.  He knows his brother, who was in charge of planning the trip, has let him down again.  “What’s the name of the island were going to?”  Jason nonchalantly says, “Rode’s Island … Rodey’s Island … something like that.”  Wincing, David pulls off the highway onto the exit for Somewhere, Rhode Island.  Under his breath he mutters, “You moron.”

            The pink Cadillac pulls into a small food stand near the beach in Somewhere, Rhode Island.  As they survey the beach, Jason marvels at the lack of people and partying; David wonders how long his patience will last.  Suddenly the back door of the food stand pops open and two attractive young women emerge carrying bags of garbage.  KATE RANCHETTE and ANGELINA MOLIE, childhood friends from Somewhere, are cleaning up their food stand to get ready for the throngs of beach goers that never seem to come.  The stand hasn’t made much money the last few summers and Kate, the older of the two, is considering selling it.  She hasn’t yet brought this up to Angelina, who is content to sell hotdogs and flirt with all the young men who pass by. 

            Jason is captivated by Angelina and wants to meet her, but David has his mind on the real parties going on to the south, nine hundred miles away.  They agree to get some breakfast at the stand so that Jason can make his move.  The initial introduction is awkward between the four of them:  Jason gawks at Angelina who considers him too Midwestern for her tastes, while Kate’s cold professionalism doesn’t mix well with David’s urge to depart. 

            The two fellows are tired, though, so they decide to spend the night.  Angelina offers them a place at her parents’ house, which is next to where Kate lives with her parents.  While Jason charms Angelina’s mom and dad, David finds himself talking to Kate again in her backyard.  She shares with him several ideas about where she wants to go in life.  She’s kicking around the idea of taking the stand somewhere else.  She says, “The big hunk of metal has wheels, right?  Can’t I just tow it down to Florida and sell hot dogs there?”  Though at first David was bored by her, the business major in him begins to see possibilities in her enterprise.  Meanwhile, Jason is getting to know Angelina in her bedroom.  Just as he is about to make a move, there is a knock at the front door.  It’s ROLPH DUNDGREN, Angelina’s boyfriend, who is 6-foot-4 and drives a yellow Hummer modified with monster truck tires.  They leave on a date while Jason stews.  He is ready to leave the next morning, but David has changed his mind and wants to stay to be with Kate.

            The next morning, David, Jason, Angelina and Kate are working in the food stand.  David offhandedly mentions to Angelina that Kate is thinking of selling or moving the stand.  Angelina confronts Kate and then storms out.  Now Kate isn’t too fond of David, who is desperately trying to think of ways to win her back.  Meanwhile, Jason consoles Angelina and it’s clear that she is growing fond of him. 

            David asks Kate out on a date to make up for his transgression and she reluctantly accepts.  The date includes flowers, music, dinner and finally a balloon ride.  But the shellfish isn’t agreeing with him and he vomits all over Kate, who pushes him out of the balloon.  To her chagrin, he saves his life by grabbing a tether and swings in the night, screaming for help. 

            As the days progress, David and Jason work at the stand.  David tries to charm his way back into Kate’s good graces, but nothing works.  Jason’s crush on Angelina grows daily, but every day that he sees her go off with Rolph in his Hummer his envy grows.

            One night at Angelina’s parents house, David devises a plan to boost the food stand’s profit margin by a staggering percentage and win Kate back in the process.  The next day he opens the stand himself and sets up an array of bizarre condiments for the hot dogs:  tomato soup, Spaghettios, popcorn, peanut butter, chocolate sauce and grape jelly.  He has invited the press and local hot dog eating champions to attend the grand opening of the new stand.  Kate is initially aghast, but she can’t argue with success. 

            Later that day, Jason professes his love for Angelina.  She is conflicted about how she feels for him.  Just then, Rolph shows up and a confrontation ensues.  Rolph is about to beat Jason to a pulp over Angelina’s screams of protest when Jason suggests an air hockey match for her love.  Rolph agrees and the match takes place on the beach in front of beachgoers and champion hot dog eaters.  Rolph boasts that his competitive nature won’t let him lose; Jason relates stories about ditching his classes to play for days straight.  It’s on!  The game is tied 11-11.  Jason slaps the puck over and Rolph blocks it just at the goal line.  Grinning, he puts his paddle aside as he psyches out his opponent.  But suddenly the score buzzer sounds for Jason.  In their haste to get the game going it seems that instead of a puck they used a hermit crab, which had walked into Rolph’s goal for the win.    

            Kate and David are sharing a quiet moment after the crowds leave.  She tells him she thinks she’s ready for a change.  They agree to hook up the stand to the pink Caddy and leave for a real Spring Break.  Once they’ve got it all hooked up, they drive into the sunset.  As they pull out, Angelina and Jason run up and jump into the back seat.  They drive off into the distance chased by a yellow Hummer with monster truck tires.